S02, Ep. 4: Special Delivery
In this episode, Mandi tells her birthing story. She shares intimate details in hopes of offering much needed information to other women like her.
Find Me Online:
Transcript
Mandi: Mandi Frantz here welcoming you to my podcast - Find Your Beautiful: Life Through the Eyes of a Christian Disabled Woman.
Mandi: Mandi Frantz here welcoming you to my podcast - Find Your Beautiful: Life Through the Eyes of a Christian Disabled Woman.
[Upbeat Background Music]
Mandi: 3 weeks. 3 long weeks. That's how long I was in the hospital just before giving birth to my first baby, my Little Bear. When I think back, I realize that this long stay was probably because doctors were being cautious. They probably didn't want me to go home and have something bad happen, or have me go into labor at home. Things were a bit different with my second pregnancy, but that had more to do with my confidence and advocacy since I went through it the first time.
I shared in previous episodes about some of the crazy experiences I had with the health care community, but today I want to continue sharing some of the practical things that happened once I went into labor. Again, I share these details because there is so little information out there for women like me, women with disabilities. Whether my story helps you prepare for your own birth, or you're just curious about my journey, my hope is that my sharing will start important conversations for others like me.
Disability does not mean life stops. We need support for life's milestones too. We don't just need medical care, but experiences from each other and people not scared, but excited to celebrate our joyous moments with us. Today I'm delighted to tell you about my special delivery.
I shared in previous episodes about some of the crazy experiences I had with the health care community, but today I want to continue sharing some of the practical things that happened once I went into labor. Again, I share these details because there is so little information out there for women like me, women with disabilities. Whether my story helps you prepare for your own birth, or you're just curious about my journey, my hope is that my sharing will start important conversations for others like me.
Disability does not mean life stops. We need support for life's milestones too. We don't just need medical care, but experiences from each other and people not scared, but excited to celebrate our joyous moments with us. Today I'm delighted to tell you about my special delivery.
[Mandi voices Ad (ads change and will vary)]
[Doorbell Sound Effect]
Mandi: March 16th, 2014. I was laying in my hospital bed with another series of contractions. I had been having Braxton-Hicks contractions for about a week and a half, so imagine my surprise when the doctor decided to check me and told me I started dilating. I had just turned 36 weeks pregnant that Saturday and all the doctors said my goal should be to get to 37 weeks. Yes, my goal. As if I had some divine control over my labor. Well, I was only 2 centimeters dilated, but any progression in my birthing at this point freaked my doctors out, so the time had come to move over to labor and delivery.
Now I know there's much controversy about epidurals and I'm not here to debate or try to sway you either way. I knew long before that point that getting an epidural was the best decision for me, so as soon as I was transferred, I asked for it. While this was the right choice for me, it was also very difficult from a practical standpoint. For those who don't know, you typically need to sit at the edge of the bed and arch your back out, so you're essentially doing a crunch. Now, if you listened to my last episode, you know that sitting up was dang near impossible. Plus, trying to do a crunch while I could barely keep my balance was also pretty impossible.
I should also note that I was at a teaching hospital. This meant that most of the doctors were actually students being overseen by attending doctors. The head of anesthesiology, who was quite amazing as you'll soon hear, was in the room supervising the student doctor trying to put the epidural in my back. Without getting into gory details, I screamed a lot in pain and the attending wound up very upset with the student, thankfully taking over. What took the student several failed attempts to do, the attending did in a matter of seconds. Yay! Success, sort of...
We quickly learned that my body is extremely sensitive and overreacts to the slightest change. Even at the lowest dose of the anesthetic, my blood pressure kept dropping out and making me feel like I was going to pass out. My awesome anesthesiologist, who told me he had actually studied my case and my disability to prepare for me, decided he would come in every 30 minutes to give me a custom dose that eased the pain of my contractions, but didn't cause my blood pressure to drop. This was true commitment and genuine caring.
Ok, that was March 16th in the evening. I only dilated to 4 centimeters, which isn't even considered active labor. March 17th was Saint Patrick's Day and to this day, my husband says, "You couldn't have had him on that day? How cool would his twenty-first birthday have been?" Hello, I'm disabled, not a divinity! Anyway, on the 17th we had an obnoxious doctor who wanted to remove my epidural and send me back to my pre-natal room. Clearly, she did not understand what we went through to get the epidural in. After much back and forth, her shift thankfully ended and a better doctor came in. Together we decided to break my water and start me on a very low dose of Pitosin, the birth inducing drug.
As this happened, the doctors also wanted to be prepared to give me a c-section if necessary. My veins are impossible. They had been drawing blood for weeks, giving me the blood thinner injections, and had already poked me several times to give me an IV. Did I mention you can't eat or drink anything? This is also unhelpful for my veins. After several failed attempts to get a central line in me, the doctors brought in a "specialist" from the ICU who was supposed to get a central line into my neck. This was probably the most excruciating part of the experience. The dude sawed back and forth in my neck while my husband and a nurse held me down. It was so bad that the nurse was crying with me as I begged her to make him stop. He finally gave up, but I was sore for days.
After that crazy experience, my awesome anesthesiologist came back and said it was ridiculous for them to have put me through that. He put a smaller line into my leg and said it would be enough if an emergency arose. The day and night passed and we were at March 18th. I had dilated to 5 centimeters, which is considered active labor, but there I stayed for hours! The doctor that day told me that we would need to do a c-section by 10pm that night if baby didn't come because I had been on the epidural and technically in labor for days. I was very scared and let me share why a c-section frightened me so much.
My limbs have very limited movement, but I've always had decent strength in my torso, specifically my abdominal muscles. Pregnancy had already weakened my abs and I was scared that recovery from a c-section would take away even more of my mobility. I wanted to breastfeed my baby and be able to engage with my little one as much as I could. I think c-sections are perfectly fine for those who need or choose that path. I'm in no way knocking it. It just wouldn't have been the best option for me.
Anyway, a resident and nurse came into my room at about 4:30pm and said I was 8 centimeters dilated. I was so happy and also in quite a bit of pain, despite the epidural. My Little Bear lodged his foot in my ribs and stayed there. The nurse told me that they couldn't check me too often because it was exposing the baby to possible infection. She said they would come back in two hours. Well, about 45 minutes later, I suddenly felt a bit of relief and panic. My baby slid down and literally felt like he was going to fall out of me. I looked over at my sister, who was my second coach, and said, "The baby is coming." She kind of giggled and said it was likely just my anxiety. I then looked at my husband, who learned over the years that I know my body really well, and told him, "The baby is coming!" He quickly started buzzing for the doctor. The nurse and resident came in and the nurse actually tried to scold me a little. She said, "I told you we can't keep checking you." I looked her right in the eyes and said, "I heard you, but the baby is coming!" The resident checked me and said, "Oh yes, you're 10 centimeters and I feel his head." Though I didn't say it, I definitely thought, "Take that nurse know-it-all!"
The story gets better. For some reason, the doctors doubted my ability to push. For this reason, the resident asked me to push before he had the room prepared for delivery. I sure did push and he was soon yelling for me to stop. I stopped pushing, but by now, Little Bear was more than ready to make his appearance. I kept shouting at the resident as he took his time getting ready, "He's coming, I can't hold him in!" He had the nerve to say to me, a first time mom who had been through some things the last 3 weeks, "Stop, you're making me nervous!" Really doc? You don't say that to your patient. Finally he was ready. My husband and my sister each held a leg and helped me get into a bit of a sitting position so I could bear down. I only pushed twice, and then on March 18, 2014 at 5:32pm, my Little Bear arrived. He cried for a couple of seconds to let us know he was breathing. 7 pounds, 18.5 inches tall and the most beautiful person I'd ever seen!
Now I know there's much controversy about epidurals and I'm not here to debate or try to sway you either way. I knew long before that point that getting an epidural was the best decision for me, so as soon as I was transferred, I asked for it. While this was the right choice for me, it was also very difficult from a practical standpoint. For those who don't know, you typically need to sit at the edge of the bed and arch your back out, so you're essentially doing a crunch. Now, if you listened to my last episode, you know that sitting up was dang near impossible. Plus, trying to do a crunch while I could barely keep my balance was also pretty impossible.
I should also note that I was at a teaching hospital. This meant that most of the doctors were actually students being overseen by attending doctors. The head of anesthesiology, who was quite amazing as you'll soon hear, was in the room supervising the student doctor trying to put the epidural in my back. Without getting into gory details, I screamed a lot in pain and the attending wound up very upset with the student, thankfully taking over. What took the student several failed attempts to do, the attending did in a matter of seconds. Yay! Success, sort of...
We quickly learned that my body is extremely sensitive and overreacts to the slightest change. Even at the lowest dose of the anesthetic, my blood pressure kept dropping out and making me feel like I was going to pass out. My awesome anesthesiologist, who told me he had actually studied my case and my disability to prepare for me, decided he would come in every 30 minutes to give me a custom dose that eased the pain of my contractions, but didn't cause my blood pressure to drop. This was true commitment and genuine caring.
Ok, that was March 16th in the evening. I only dilated to 4 centimeters, which isn't even considered active labor. March 17th was Saint Patrick's Day and to this day, my husband says, "You couldn't have had him on that day? How cool would his twenty-first birthday have been?" Hello, I'm disabled, not a divinity! Anyway, on the 17th we had an obnoxious doctor who wanted to remove my epidural and send me back to my pre-natal room. Clearly, she did not understand what we went through to get the epidural in. After much back and forth, her shift thankfully ended and a better doctor came in. Together we decided to break my water and start me on a very low dose of Pitosin, the birth inducing drug.
As this happened, the doctors also wanted to be prepared to give me a c-section if necessary. My veins are impossible. They had been drawing blood for weeks, giving me the blood thinner injections, and had already poked me several times to give me an IV. Did I mention you can't eat or drink anything? This is also unhelpful for my veins. After several failed attempts to get a central line in me, the doctors brought in a "specialist" from the ICU who was supposed to get a central line into my neck. This was probably the most excruciating part of the experience. The dude sawed back and forth in my neck while my husband and a nurse held me down. It was so bad that the nurse was crying with me as I begged her to make him stop. He finally gave up, but I was sore for days.
After that crazy experience, my awesome anesthesiologist came back and said it was ridiculous for them to have put me through that. He put a smaller line into my leg and said it would be enough if an emergency arose. The day and night passed and we were at March 18th. I had dilated to 5 centimeters, which is considered active labor, but there I stayed for hours! The doctor that day told me that we would need to do a c-section by 10pm that night if baby didn't come because I had been on the epidural and technically in labor for days. I was very scared and let me share why a c-section frightened me so much.
My limbs have very limited movement, but I've always had decent strength in my torso, specifically my abdominal muscles. Pregnancy had already weakened my abs and I was scared that recovery from a c-section would take away even more of my mobility. I wanted to breastfeed my baby and be able to engage with my little one as much as I could. I think c-sections are perfectly fine for those who need or choose that path. I'm in no way knocking it. It just wouldn't have been the best option for me.
Anyway, a resident and nurse came into my room at about 4:30pm and said I was 8 centimeters dilated. I was so happy and also in quite a bit of pain, despite the epidural. My Little Bear lodged his foot in my ribs and stayed there. The nurse told me that they couldn't check me too often because it was exposing the baby to possible infection. She said they would come back in two hours. Well, about 45 minutes later, I suddenly felt a bit of relief and panic. My baby slid down and literally felt like he was going to fall out of me. I looked over at my sister, who was my second coach, and said, "The baby is coming." She kind of giggled and said it was likely just my anxiety. I then looked at my husband, who learned over the years that I know my body really well, and told him, "The baby is coming!" He quickly started buzzing for the doctor. The nurse and resident came in and the nurse actually tried to scold me a little. She said, "I told you we can't keep checking you." I looked her right in the eyes and said, "I heard you, but the baby is coming!" The resident checked me and said, "Oh yes, you're 10 centimeters and I feel his head." Though I didn't say it, I definitely thought, "Take that nurse know-it-all!"
The story gets better. For some reason, the doctors doubted my ability to push. For this reason, the resident asked me to push before he had the room prepared for delivery. I sure did push and he was soon yelling for me to stop. I stopped pushing, but by now, Little Bear was more than ready to make his appearance. I kept shouting at the resident as he took his time getting ready, "He's coming, I can't hold him in!" He had the nerve to say to me, a first time mom who had been through some things the last 3 weeks, "Stop, you're making me nervous!" Really doc? You don't say that to your patient. Finally he was ready. My husband and my sister each held a leg and helped me get into a bit of a sitting position so I could bear down. I only pushed twice, and then on March 18, 2014 at 5:32pm, my Little Bear arrived. He cried for a couple of seconds to let us know he was breathing. 7 pounds, 18.5 inches tall and the most beautiful person I'd ever seen!
[Bling]
Mandi: Do you want to hear more about life through my eyes? You can help support this podcast so I have more flexibility to drop other things and focus on creating awesome content for you!
These are 4 important things you can do today to support Find Your Beautiful:
1. Please give this podcast a 5 star rating on Apple Podcasts and/or on the MandiBox Beauty Facebook page. It's even more meaningful if you include a sentence or 2 about why you listen.
2. Go to the Find Your Beautiful website at th3mandibox.wixsite.com/fybpodcast. Click Episodes and choose any episode you want to listen to. Then scroll down and click on the link to support this podcast. My friend Laurie's $5 per month contribution is what helped me get this microphone. Your support will make this podcast better and better.
3. The more the merrier! Share this podcast with 3 friends this week.
4. Download the Anchor Mobile App and leave me a voice message so I know you're listening. You can give feedback and ask questions. You may even get featured in a future episode.
This podcast is also available on iTunes, Google Podcasts, Spotify, and any other place you like to listen! Visit my website linked in the description to get access to all the platforms.
[Mandi voiceover to 'Compton' music]: Next I'll be talking about all the things I wish I knew before becoming a disabled parent in an episode called, "If Only You Knew." ‘Til next time Beauties!
These are 4 important things you can do today to support Find Your Beautiful:
1. Please give this podcast a 5 star rating on Apple Podcasts and/or on the MandiBox Beauty Facebook page. It's even more meaningful if you include a sentence or 2 about why you listen.
2. Go to the Find Your Beautiful website at th3mandibox.wixsite.com/fybpodcast. Click Episodes and choose any episode you want to listen to. Then scroll down and click on the link to support this podcast. My friend Laurie's $5 per month contribution is what helped me get this microphone. Your support will make this podcast better and better.
3. The more the merrier! Share this podcast with 3 friends this week.
4. Download the Anchor Mobile App and leave me a voice message so I know you're listening. You can give feedback and ask questions. You may even get featured in a future episode.
This podcast is also available on iTunes, Google Podcasts, Spotify, and any other place you like to listen! Visit my website linked in the description to get access to all the platforms.
[Mandi voiceover to 'Compton' music]: Next I'll be talking about all the things I wish I knew before becoming a disabled parent in an episode called, "If Only You Knew." ‘Til next time Beauties!
Comments
Post a Comment